There are:
So many ups and downs,
highs and lows,
goods bads.
Achievements,
Disappointments.
all of these I’ve seen.
All these I’ve had.
None other like the one that reached out and slapped me, that night.
As I walked myself
half-asleep up the stairs.
I threw on the light and pulled at the faucet.
As Always.
Make the water as warm as it will go.
Make the shock as minimal as possible.
And then there it was .
I looked up.
The wishing well.
The shouting inner soul.
Alive.
My biggest enemy.
The mirror groaned and stared at me.

I should have made it poetic.
For you.
I could have made it poetic.

Broken it,
pound at it,bloodied my own two fists.
Till one of us gave up.
or
someone [doubtful] found me.
I hated that mirror.
But I didn’t.
Shout out.
I didn’t.
Scream and pound.
I didn’t pick up the nearest object and
BAM.

I just stared,
and saw.
Asked myself
‘Why is that quiet,meek,lost,single tear letting itself free now?’
Why have I waken up to the reality of what I am for so long.
And am now moved to tears?
Moved to that one tear.


I wish I could go on with an answer.
I wish I could make you feel whole with an answer to that.
I can’t.

I can barely recollect what happened past that point.
I’m sure I finished my nightly routines.
And made my way to the only place that comforts me.

Because I woke up in it the next morning.


So here I am now, recalling my ups and downs.
That random day.

Thinking always thinking.
Wondering.
When I am going to find it in me,
to turn that mirror back around.